Category Archives: Dreams

I’ve been having bizarre dreams lately. The other night, I dreamed that – for whatever reason, I was fussing with these little teeny round silver magnets in bed. I don’t remember what the hell I could possibly be doing with them, but I remember waking up, in the dream, with bits of my sheets stuck together with these little magnets. I searched for them, but alas was unable to find them all. Recently I dreamed about meeting a guy that I’d been talking to, and this wierd construct of him, ‘the good ex’ and somebody else showed up. We were going to meet in a really posh hotel, and I remember being on my celphone in the lobby as he called. I was surrounded by yuppies in suits as he zoomed by on a bike, his phone to his ear as he told me that he’d just arrived. I said, “Oh, yeah – I can see you now.” He turns to see me in the lobby and grins. “I’ll be right there.” He says before wheeling around a corner and crashing headfirst into the back of a garbage truck. Very slick. He quickly rights himself, brushing himself off and looking over at the hotel. (did I mention that most of the activity in my dreams happens in cartoonish fashion? Nobody ever seems to get really hurt in these kinds of dreams.) Everybody – and I do mean everybody, in the lobby starts applauding. He looks utterly embarrassed, and I, of course, being the dork that I am – thinks that this is the most adorably hilarious thing I’ve ever seen. I have a penchant for being attracted to clumsy dorks who make me laugh. He comes inside, and people start congratulating him. He quickly makes his way to my side, grabs my hand and pulls me towards the elevators, saying, “My god, I can’t believe you saw that.” I reassure him that I’ve been witness to worse, and we both laugh as the elevator goes up to the penthouse. (I’ve been in a penthouse once. Me and my brother were at the beach as kids, and I remember knocking on someone’s door, asking to see their penthouse because I’d never seen one before – or something like that. It was really swank. They had a huge marine aquarium and everything.) This one is really posh, and I’m startled that he can afford it. I’m used to being the ‘moneymaker’ in all of my relationships, and this is a nice twist. It is at this point that I woke up, but I’m not sure what the trigger for the wakeup was.

Dream Journal

Just woke from this fantastically weird dream where I was apparently running around assisting Sam and Dean Winchester as they hunted down something that I didn’t have a frame of reference for. At one point, we were all running preternaturally fast around this field, trying to corner this enormous canid demony thing – then, somehow both of them became trapped in a room and couldn’t get out. It was up to me to dispatch the thingie, and I just kept hearing Dean Winchester saying the word ‘CREMULIZE (pron: KREM-YOU-LIES) over and over.

I found the thingie, and said it, but apparently wasn’t saying it in the right spot on the property. I kept taking a few steps over to the right and saying it, then to the left. Each time, the boys would yell the word, and then I would say it, but no dice.

After what seemed like a suitably comedic amount of time, given the pacing of the show itself, the thingie was finally dealt with. It ended up looking like this tiny human torso with head attached, only bones, inside a small rubbery sack that I could only just fit my hand around.

Afterward, this really odd ‘advertisement’ of sorts popped up that said, “Aliens are just like Humans, but with different (the word is no longer coming to me now that I’m awake and typing this – I want to say ‘theme music’ or ‘maths’)’ and below this, there was a picture of a caucasian human male with sandy brown hair and unremarkable features, which the skin would slowly roll down and away from, exposing a Grey beneath.

The text provided examples of how aliens would try to infiltrate humanity, but couldn’t quite get it right – social expressions/statements/etc.

Funkiest dream I’ve had in a LONG time.


Yeah, now to try to get back to sleep.

WTF, brain. Where did Benedict Cumberbatch go? Oh, yeah – he, Matt Smith and Tom Hiddleston were featured earlier in the evening, trying to court me at a pub. In the end, we all started skipping down a cobblestone street singing ‘We’re Off to See the Wizard’ as we headed out to somebody’s place for a night of debauchery – but then it gets all foggy.


I really do have the wierdest dreams:

Sometime, during the week of Nov 18 – Nov 22 – as I started descending into illness last Monday night, I had a dream where this odd, purple-ish round Heads Up Display kinda hovered at the corner just inside my field of vision. There were buttons on the disc that I could select, but I started turning the HUD image around to check it out, and before I could choose any of them, it went away. Once it had gone, I was left with the distinct feeling that the controls were something I could tweak that would change my feelings, or my circumstances, almost like setting cheat codes for life – but I couldn’t understand how to work the controls.

Then, throughout my entire sleep cycle last night, I was CERTAIN that there was this one mathematical task that I needed to figure out – or something similar – a really important puzzle to suss out. I also kept feeling this STRONG urge to have my feet covered for some wierd ass reason. I’d keep getting up to use the bathroom, then by the time I was tucking myself back in, I would remind myself – “Oh, yeah. I REALLY need to do that thing/figure that thing that I was thinking about out.” But then my head would explain that it was just a dream, and I remember feeling relieved that I wouldn’t have do/figure out whatever thing was rolling around in my dream.

Then – at one point, I ended up in this room where people were assembling things with differently colored blocks of what looked like Floam (a water-soluble molding material made from polystyrene beads that is REALLY funky and fun to squeeze and mold). It was like people were putting these large, weird doughy pieces of the United States together, state by state while floating around in zero gravity. I was able to bounce up into the field and fly around a little, but I don’t remember if I helped out in any way or just screwed around going ‘WHEE! ZERO G!’.

I also seem to remember that Channing Tatum was there, because HELLO Freud “Psyche wants happy button pushed” and apparently Mr. Tatum was tonight’s ‘Sexy Wierd Inexplicable Dream Cameo’ – but he just jumped into the air and started helping the others assemble everything.

The assembly itself seemed to be important, but people were grinning and laughing as they went about it. It was more joy than goofing off.


Last night featured a rather detailed dream in which I became a horse owner, for some mysterious reason. I was walking around an open air market, searching for yummies for my horse, and asking people what were the best things to feed it. I found a few things that the horse REALLY liked, and that were apparently really good for it. I would pet the horse, and it would nudge me, then go off to hang out with the other horses that happened to be casually strolling around the market.

During this entire episode, I was thinking to myself, “How the HELL am I going to afford a HORSE? Where on earth will I PUT it??” But, apparently, the horse was a necessary item for some reason. It was also very friendly and seemed to like me very much.

This then somehow devolved into a dream with zombies, with absolutely no segueway. I was running with a group of people, striving to escape the hungry zombie hoarde. OF COURSE there was an ‘adorable’, helpless and utterly USELESS child that we had to cart around to ‘save’, which was irritating in and of itself. We suddenly happened upon a boat. We took the boat out to a large house on an island with steep sides, and I turned back to the shoreline to watch this teeming mass of rotting bodies walking into the surf, their heads just going ‘BLOOP’ beneath the surface of the waves.

Somehow, we are able to get into the house, which is absolutely filled to the brim with affluential types that honestly have no idea that the zombie apocalypse is upon us. They’re just partying and having a good time. We show up, covered in gore, and almost immediately these snitty, bulky security goons show up to try to show us to the door, and we make short work of them. Well… *I* make short work of them. Since we didn’t have guns, for some STUPID reason, I neatly chopped one guy’s hand off with a machete. The message that they finally received from this was ‘I mean business’. I seemed to be one of the only people in the team that was capable of actually killing either zombies or people.

At some point, the zombies are able to start banging on the sides of the house – because fuck physics.

It was at this crucial point that I woke up.

Every once in a great while, my brain presents me with a truly lovely dream. I’m pretty sure that if any of these dreams actually happened in real life, I’d react JUST. LIKE. THIS.